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Frak Me Mondays: A Look Back to First Day of School

September 2, 2011


Frak Me Mondays

Dude. Seriously.

First day of the girls going back to school.

Morning goes pretty good.

They get up easy.

They actually choose and eat breakfast with no muss.

No sign of Rosie’s meltdown the night before that she didn’t want to go to school.

I get ready. I put on black capris, black top and kick it up a notch with unmatchable lime green shoes.

Don’t ask me why I bought unmatchable shoes. I did. I forgot there was no way you were actually going to get me to wear any other clothing in lime green.

They were on sale.

My girls insisted I wear a green top. So I switched to a sage green top. I kept asking them if they matched.

They promised it looked good. Of course, Rosie was in an outfit that had at least three different shades of green and she was wearing purple loafers with it. Lil was in a SpongeBob tee. These are perhaps not the children you want making your clothing decisions.

I fretted over it the whole way dropping them off, at one point taking a shoe off and holding it against my top and asking them, “Seriously?”

Um, no!
Okay, maybe it’s not as horrible as I think, but still no.

Lil responded with the fact that she didn’t care if she matched when she went out, so why should I? Rosie piped in with what was wrong with her greens? If her greens matched, then so did mine. Umm, hello, all her greens were on the same shirt.

I resolved to return home and put my black top back on after I dropped them off and not let them get voting power on my outfits again. Geez. I’m wearing the shoes cuz they don’t match anything else. We’ll say it adds a splash of pizazz to the black, mkay?

So I pull up to Rosie’s school (and mind you we are early before the crowd). I pull up as far as I can because the parent in front of me has decided the thirty feet of space in front of her are not to be used. Another parent has pulled into a parking space instead of following the rules. He can’t easily back out because of where I am. Oh, he could have, if he’d have turned his fricking steering wheel all the way. The dude gets out, throws his arms in the air and proceeds to chew me out for FOLLOWING THE RULES of how to drop our children off in the morning. And he does this in front of my kids. What a douche. Seriously. What a douche. I somehow don’t call him that and pull ahead when the parent ahead of me pulls off. It takes a minute, but we get Rosie out of the car, where she proceeds to walk as S-L-O-W-L-Y as she possibly can all the way in. I can’t drive off because I don’t trust her to get in. Fortunately, I’ve pulled all the way forward so I’m not stopping parents from dropping their kids off and going on.

I then drive on to Lil’s school, listening to her go on and on about me worrying too much about my clothes matching. Yeah. Right. She gets out safely, walks speedily in as another parent going the opposite direction to me decides to pull right up alongside me and see if her kid can’t slam her truck door right into my driver’s side door. You know I got a name for that, too.

Holy frak. And it’s just Monday!


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